Your mom is awesome. Not like all those other moms. Your mom is actually cool. And gosh darn it, you’re gonna let her know how you feel about her this year. But without all that mooshy-gooshy feelings business. No, you’re going to get her the most fantastic, most wonderful, most momliest present under that shiny plastic Christmas tree. And she’ll get it, she’ll know what you’re trying to say. ‘Cause she’s cool like that. Besides, you’re like five now. It’s about time you started getting her something better than yet another Sharpie masterpiece imprinted onto the kitchen table through thin printer paper. Definitely time.
It’s the Monday before Christmas and you’ve finally hounded your dad off the couch to drive you to Walmart. You’ve been saving your allowance for pretty much forever- it’s been at least two weeks- so you’ve got a whole three-fifty to lavish on your ever-so-deserving supermom, and you’re dad’s promised to chip in another two bucks if you clean out that granola bar you’ve been saving under your booster seat for the last month. That’s almost six dollars! But it looks like all the other kiddies fresh out of school for winter break have had the same idea. The corridors are packed with screeching schoolchildren and you know that greedy gleam in their eyes. So what’s a resourceful kindergartner to do?